The Dark Secrets of Playboy

Book Review: The Dark Secrets of Playboy by S.A. Tatenbaum

Hi there, boho’s! Welcome to the reviews you want to read. Here, nothing is off-limits — from books that expose the shadows behind glamorous lives to the wild, seductive worlds of sex and stripping, and to alternative bohemian lifestyles that thrive on freedom and rebellion.

Since it’s Halloween season, I decided to review an absolutely terrifying book, “The Dark Secrets of Playboy.”

These aren’t polite summaries. They’re honest, raw, and unapologetic takes for anyone bold enough to explore pleasure, power, and intrigue without judgment. Not for underage viewers.

This book was authored by S.A. Tetenbaum, who was employed as a butler in the Playboy Mansion in the 1980s-1990s. If anyone knows me, I love Playboy secrets, and this book did not disappoint. I was a massive fan of The Girls Next Door when that came out and still watch reruns. After Hugh Hefner died in 2017, many former employees, bunnies, girlfriends, and others associated with the Playboy brand have shared various stories and memoirs about what life was really like behind the gates and under the “Playmates at Play” signs. No spoilers, but I could not put this book down.

The intros were mild, mainly about the staff and their roles in the mansion. It also details the dynamics between Hef and the harem of girls he kept. The author was a butler who waited on Mr. Hefner and his girlfriends. It covered their shopping habits and strange eating habits, as well as all the pets and other idiosyncrasies of the playmates and Hef. 

What I found most fascinating since then is that, for a while in that area of the country, Playmates weren’t always accepted in the higher social circles. This alternative lifestyle in the middle of Beverly Hills was one of the many juxtapositions that made this memoir even more telling. 

The drug use and sex weren’t the things that stood out to me the most, though. While yes, they did seem to be having a really good time, I couldn’t help but feel sad that, with all those resources at their disposal, it was more about living a hedonistic lifestyle undercover than anything else. The secrecy demanded of the staff contrasted with the lack of privacy for anyone else on the property. Plus, the donations to charities or hosting events seemed like attempts to fit in with the posh community surrounding the lewd gothic mansion. They didn’t work and, in the end, just seemed sad. Like, still the Playboy that didn’t fit in.

So, what do men do when they are sad and outcasted? A lot of things, and that's what the second half of the book is about. I was shocked to read some of the stories that involved not only Hef but his friends and what they would do to each other and the women around them. Most of these women were naïve and young, so the relationship between them and men who could be their fathers seems very predatory. Then, with the murder of Dorothy Stratton covered in the book and other famous incidents that happened over the years, which would tarnish the Playboy reputation.

The only saving grace —and I think he was being as objectionable as possible —was the author himself. He did seem like the only one, along with some of the other staff, who could see that this was absurd behavior. And almost like a protector at times, not only of Hef from the outside world but also of the girls from Hef or his friends. It was a game of merry-go-round to see who would have the conquest of next month’s fresh Playmate. It was repetitive and boorish, so Hef and his friends would make the environment raunchier, spicier, more vulgar, and more degrading to the women who lived, worked, and visited the mansion.

The real story is that, from a middle-American viewpoint, the Playboy lifestyle might seem like the ultimate American bachelor dream. Big mansion, Hollywood fame, endless parties, lots of money, beautiful women, and essentially everything you could want. But the cost of living behind those gates was much higher than anyone expected. Still, the allure of the Mansion pulled these girls (some barely 18) out of their small, middle-American towns for a shot at something bigger. Being in Playboy was seen by some women and communities as a goal. However, after reading this memoir, life behind those gates was anything but the illusion it projected to the world. 

In the end, Hef wasn’t a Playboy; he was just someone who could manipulate people and the world at large into believing that what he was doing was not only okay but should be desired. I mean, I even believed it to a certain point, but the curtain was pulled back in this book. It makes me feel empathy for all the women who fell for the lie and ended up abused and used by a sick man hiding behind a corporation. 

I also commend the author who witnessed very traumatic events and not only tried to help or assist in those situations but also survived to share his cautionary tale. The difference between these books and others I’ve read—especially recent ones—is that this one includes stories from before the internet era. The Mansion was essentially a fortress, kept under lock and key, where no cameras or iPhones could interrupt the debauchery inside. That’s what made it so terrifying. While the cameras inside “caught everything," no one else really knew what was happening there. It wasn’t until the 2000s and reality TV that Playboy began to shift from being more masochistic to becoming more family-friendly due to the lens that was now exposing the mansion exploits. Still, I don’t buy the Disney vibe of the Girls Next Door show, and reading this book only confirmed that this sick man did sick things to women in those California hills. 

TW: This book does deal with violence, assault, drug use, and sexual assault.

Here is the link to the book (this is not an affiliate link): Amazon – The Dark Secret Of Playboy

Hope this one isn’t too scary for you – leave your own thoughts below!

Love & glitter,

BW